I never thought I would be the kind of mom who would worry over every little thing, but then I brought home this little bundle of pink all wrapped up in my arms and my world shifted and spun off kilter. I stopped being so laid back and began being cautious and careful. I made calculated decisions instead of spontaneous ones. I researched instead of reacted. I planned instead of playing.
My first born is Lindsey. In so many ways, in the theoretical and in a very literal way, Lindsey has stretched and pulled me as I have learned to parent… especially where to let go and let her grow. The silly side of this is her need to climb everything she can get her hands and toes on. She shimmies up walls, door frames and any playground equipment nearby. I used to freak out. The reality is I can’t be around 24 hours a day, and no matter how much i forbid it, she will find a way to do it because she is hardwired to test herself. I have begged her to hang on tight, because that’s what mom’s do. Only God knows why He made her this way. Someday I am going to ask him point blank this very question, and probably He will say it is because I needed to learn to let go and let Him be big enough to handle it. ☺ The other side of it is the heart side. I want to protect her from the falls and bumps of life, and I can’t be there 24 hours a day either. I watched her walk off to the bus today knowing it was a hard day for her and she left with tears in her eyes, brimming, ready to spill. Oh how i wanted to run over and relieve her burden and stress. I wanted to take it all away. But I had to believe God was big enough to handle this too. Who knew my kids growing up was going to grow me too?
Ever have trouble letting go? It holds us back from victory.
Kids come by it naturally. They want to succeed, and will try and try till they do. They finally achieve what they set out to do and they raise their arms in victory and shout out to the world their awesomeness! When did I stop doing that? I used to do it. I remember…
I remember sitting in a swing, talking to God, arms outstretched, and telling Him all the ways I was gonna make it! I was awesome and nothing in the world could stop me. It was like the momentum from the swing was pushing me forward, through the tough stuff, and head on toward victory.
I dont know about you, but i need a good dose of momentum right now. There are challenges on my plate that seem overwhelming. But I will hang on tight to the ropes holding me up so I can let go and let God swing me to new heights, on towards victory. I know He’s smiling at me, waiting for me to believe He is big enough to handle whatever it is I have… If only I’d let go, so I could hang on tight to the promises He has waiting for me to claim.