Oh why, I ask you, why can’t i just learn this lesson and be done with it? I am a jackrabbit in a world where the faster you go and the more you fit into your day is the measure of how successful you are. So in a sense I fit in. I am spot on. Is there any chance that this will change soon? No? Yeah, that’s what I figured. That’s why I cant seem to learn this lesson and have it stick.
Jackrabbits miss out on a lot. They miss out on the incessant giggling in the backseat by being annoyed instead of joining in. They miss out on spontaneous walks around the block with the family dog, the bike rides begged for, the books that wish they’d be read, and the dances that cant jig without a partner.
What do i really want to remember 10 years from now? *GULP* No – seriously? My kids will be 17, 20, and 21 in a mere 10 years. Wait! Hold the phone! I will nearly be an empty nester! Stop! I mean it! I am trembling in my seat here, barely able to put fingers to keys because what I will remember is what i WISH i would have done. I wish i said yes to the bike ride, the walk, the book, the whatever!
I come back to this over and over. I learn the lesson in one area – on one front – and then a week later I get slammed again from behind, realizing I am doing it again somewhere else.
The girls wanted to go on a bike ride the other day. I had a ton to do. I just simply ditched it. I cant for the life of me remember what was so huge i needed to get done. But what i do remember is Alli’s “throw your head back laugh” as we raced down the street – them against me. I won, almost. I am ashamed to say I have longer legs but much less gusto than those two growing girls do. We dropped the bikes and swang and ran around to all the playground equipment like little 5 year olds. We laughed till we were breathless. And we did what all girls do these days, we set the timer on our camera and ran into the frame to preserve the moments for all time.
Please God, Please… can you make this lesson stick for me this time? I want to remember the turtle top moment and the sunset that night. I dont ever want to look back on these next ten years and wish i had done anything different. Keep my heart raw and real – make it prime and ready to hear the truth so I never miss these moments. They happen just once in a lifetime. Thank you for giving me this beautiful time of life, regardless how hard it often is week in and week out. It is a gift I cherish, even if i dont say so enough…